Songs on The Shi**er

What's the craziest thing you've ever done? Some would probably say something along the lines of a drug or some type of murderous scandal. Well, for one, this isn't the ghetto (where I live) and two, I've got people to positively inspire. So in saying that, If I were asked that question above, I would say, "One of the craziest things that I've done and continue to do, is write songs while sitting on the toilet, pooping."





For those of you who don't know, pooping is a delightful pleasure. Studies show, that for some, pooping is known as a meditation or medicinal for those in a stressful state of mind. Keep in mind, I am no doctor nor am I a faithful patient to this theory, but I will say, whenever I am feeling heavy and I need to lighten up mentally and physically, the shitter is my place of pouring out my feelings inside and out. That sounded epically gross but I must confess; it is the greatest activity I've come across in a long time...

There were times in my life and career where I stumbled upon brain farts and mind constipation. It was like hitting a dead end. Those of you who are songwriters can definitely relate, I'm sure. So have you tried writing on the toilet? I kid you not, I wrote a swell portion of my songs on the pooper scooper. If not written, definitely thought of. I can name at least four songs on my upcoming album that were either written in full or at least thought of while throwing up from my other end. I will add, that the only reason some were only thought of and not written at that point in time was because I did not have a pen and paper on site. Should I have used toilet paper and... Poop residue? No. That would only work for stringy diarrhea. Sorry. This is what happens when I write on the "hot seat."



Yes, I have too many nicknames for this. But I will get serious right after this remark: Writing songs on the shitter AND having people like the songs that I write to the point where they purchase them off of the internet and sing along to them at shows would formulate that I, Evan Taylor Jones, am THE shit? Okay jokes are over. In all seriousness, you've got to try it. Don't think about the gross aspects of it and the longevity of the horrid smells. Think positively of what is pouring out of your heart through the stress release activity. After all, you are practicing a form of meditation and medicinal release of tension...

After you're done you'll feel light and ready to take on the world in a new way; on the John. If ever you feel like your desk in your room just isn't easing your thought process and inspirational motives, take a trip to where the magic happens; park yourself where your bowel movements feel most comfortable. You'll be doing your body a favor as well as your career or career to be. I must warn you, you must not enter after I have completed SONGS ON THE SHI**ER...

Don't Shoot Yourself

To be honest, I know over 100 girls that would love to be with me and have a full-on committed relationship with me right now and for the rest of my life. Don't get me wrong; I'm not being cocky at all. I'm just using the number as an example and a statement as to why I chose... You.

I can now believe that every girl is the same or at least has one life changing trait in common; they NEVER know exactly what they want. Men, just when you think you're in, you're not even close. And don't let the drunk talk fool you, because the next day, you'll be thinking of ways to reinvent memory lane for the girl who once told you she liked you and wanted to be with you; while she was intoxicated. Where am I going with this? I don't know. But then again, where do I ever go with anything, right? Normally I write for one specific purpose, but I figured since it's been so long, that I might as well touch on everything that I've witnessed since my last writing shabang...

As for myself, my relationship status is great and strong as of last night and this morning. I spent a great night at the beach underneath a gorgeous moon with someone special.



We got to talking about US and where WE were going with THIS. She made it clear that she does, indeed, want to be with me and that I should stick around and wait for the right time. Now, it's about ME being patient. So hard to do for me. I love being with someone. I'm one of the few guys that I know that can say the next girlfriend that I have, whoever it may be, I want to get married to her. Scary? Grow up, if so. Women, you always complain about having a guy who will always be there and who you can trust. Then, you go around twisting your words and saying... "It's complicated" or "I'm confused."





The bull has shitted himself and without a doubt, this next quote should be taken very seriously. "It is of sure sadness when your words of intoxication are better said than your words said when you are sober." A pirate by the name of Nave Rolyat Sonej said that. Now read that name back words and tell me his name in english...

I'm sorry. My feelings come out in these writings so much that I forget to care about who is reading them. Eh, who am I fooling? I don't care at all. I can be honest in my writing. It's MY writing and it's the way that I feel. I would love to talk great about relationship aspects, all the time, but for now, some folks have me writing about the negative. I'm not saying that guys are perfect. But I am one, and I have a huge heart; you won't find that everywhere, sorry. So the next time, ladies, you SAY you like someone and (SAY) that you want to be with them, make sure you mean it. And again, this has NOTHING to do with me, because I could care less, remember? Karma. Consequence. It's all the same. When it comes around to kill you, DON'T SHOOT YOURSELF...

Son of A BEACH!

The beach; a place where there is no limit to how much fun you want to have with nature. I can't remember the last time I was sitting at home and I threw mud at someone's face. Can you? Probably never happened. Your parents would kill you and put you six feet deep in the place where you got the mud. Just saying; the beach is a natural playground and I love it....



Today, I went to Cocoa beach. Now now, I know it's not at all the best beach to go to in Florida, but it still has its value. For me, I was interested in the large amount of jelly-fish I saw. Honestly, there were families of them. In the effort to body surf, I was pulled up near the shore, and when I put my head and body out of the water, a jelly-fish welcomed me with a hip bump. It was all gravy. Believe it or not, he was black. I think he was just trying to holler at a fellow negro, no tentacles attached. Besides that, there were no other concerns or creatures of the ocean that I could see. The beautiful lady friend that I was with, Amber Hastings, said she saw a dolphin. But that thought turned into her saying maybe it was a shark. And on that note, I'm heading back to the shore....





The sand was as hot as the devils homeland. It was no place for a person to just stand, barefooted; for a long amount of time that is. We, Amber and I, lied down on our towels and let the sun cook us for a bit. Yes, I enjoy long walks on the beach AND tanning. I'm charcoal dark now and Amber's nose is pealing. Definitely worth it though. Got some good pictures and great conversation. (P.S. I would LOVE LOVE LOVE to be her boyfriend. Just saying. I think she knows.) We got to talking about the different types of people you see on the beach and also, the different types of trash you see on the beach. This is a subject that urges me to stand up and do something...

I understand that the beach is, at times, a lazy place. But that doesn't mean an individual cannot simply walk to a trash can and throw away their garbage. Put it this way; you came to the beach. You're gonna have to get up and leave eventually. So in the event that you get up, walk over to a trash can and throw away your homely remains. It is more than simple and nothing against, 1st graders, but a 1st grader could do it and if you can't, that stands for arrogance and stupidity. Why would you not want to keep your beach clean? Please do this. Please help keep the beach clean....

I feel like I'm nagging a little bit. So, the last thing I will say about this is that you, me, and everyone has a home. The majority of us like it clean, neat, if not spotless. The birds, fish and other sea creatures have a home too. The Beach. Don't you hate when someone comes in your home and dirties it? Just because the creatures of the beach cannot speak doesn't mean they don't have feelings too. Do not enter the territory of another and dirty it. Keep it clean as if it were yours. 'Nuff said you Son of A BEACH...

Black Girl? White Girl? The Odd Side of Beauty

This, for many, is a trending topic. When I was in high school, I found out that, me being black, I was considered a minority. There was nothing wrong with this, at all. In fact, I liked it. I like meeting new people and welcoming new ethnicities as friends. I enjoy it more now that I'm more open minded and in tune with my own intellect. More importantly, it was the way I was raised...

When I was 8, my Mother married a caucasian man and it changed my life forever. I was no longer going to live in the ghetto, for one. I no longer had a real reason to get in trouble for no reason, if you will. It began to make sense to me that it was okay to befriend, date, and even marry interracially. I am so grateful and blessed to have had my eyes open to this at such an early age. Okay, shall I stop rambling about my story? Yes. To my preferences now...

Black women. You are all beautiful. If you haven't noticed, black women or black folks in general tend to have the whitest smiles. The next time you're out and about, look at your chocolate neighbor, right in the mouth and watch their smile shine. Besides that. I, personally, can only befriend the black women. No, I'm not racist at all. My Mother was the most beautiful women in the world, in my eyes. One thing you must know and understand about me is that I look up to my Mother. She once said to me, "Dating/Marrying a person of the same race gets boring." I believe that whole heartedly. I like odd things. I love spontaneity. For example, I marry a girl that is far from my ethnicity. We make love and have kids. Our child comes out with light brown curly hair and gorgeous hazel eyes. With this child's mouth closed, there will be no resemblance of he/she being my child. But let the child smile. The smile of that child will be just like mine. That is the beauty of interracial love. If one is able to notice the most delicate things on a child that relates to the Father, I am at peace. Black women, please do not take it personal (I know some of you are sitting, reading this, mouth dropped). It only means that I am different. Good or bad; that's for you to judge. I still love you and I'm grateful for you. Thank you for being sisters to me...

White women. You are all beautiful too. Where do I start? As you know, from the paragraphs above, my Step-Father is white. I love him to death. He has taught me how to be polite and how to use my manners. All in all, I now know that there is a time and a place for everything because of that man. With that said, I have befriended you, I have dated you, and I'd marry you. There are tons more great things to say about you all, but, I must confess; there are just enough bad things to say. I start with your attitude. Some of your have your heads up your ass. You're too snobby and dramatic. I dislike that very much. If you could just be grateful and know that you are taken care of, I would not be saying this. It needs to change. Now, not all of you are like this. Don't sit and read this and think of a way to retaliate. Onto the greater things about you all. The majority of you love the beach. I am a lover of the beach as well. It is such a natural playground and a beautiful place. Many of my songs were thought of/written on the beach, believe it or not. Beyond that, most of you have great taste in music. If I were to say "Hendrix at Woodstock" you would know where to find the best quality video for that saying. Music is my life, by the way. To conclude, I do believe that it is the white women that shall give me my oddly beautiful children. If you all didn't know, I'm getting ready to be an older brother in January. My sister is on her way and her name will be Lillian Avery Jones. My biological Father made love to a white women. Damn; if I didn't know any better, I would say its in the blood. Need I say more?

I posted a status to my websites saying that I would blog about this. A young lady commented on it saying, "What about hispanics?" and so I told her I was colored blind. It's true. If we really want to get down to things, I would date hispanics. But that is not the point of this blog posts. I wrote this to get the whole, "Black or White" conversation off of my shoulders and out of my hands. I remember in high school, there were black girls that would call me a sell out because white girls liked me and I would always be surrounded by them. I took it as pure jealousy. Of course, they couldn't admit it, but there is no other word for it. So this is just to set the record straight; I am not at all racist. Just different and easily entertained and inspired. I do get bored easily. My imagination won't let me sit in one place for a long period of time. With that said, my imagination is the reason for me striving for odd beauty. Don't hate. We're all different. Some more than others. This is who I am...

I'd like to thank my Mother for marrying the most amazing man in the world and giving me a Step-Father that I can count on. I'd also like to thank my Step-Father for creating an important part of my imagination; the odd side of beauty...

We are Light and Love

At this time, I ask that the reader would take a moment silence for the life of Kelly McConnell and his family. Kelly passed away this morning after he and his family were hit by a drunk driver. He was a friend to me and a best friend to many others. I; We; All of us will miss you Kelly. It's devastating the way you left, but at the same time it is a sign; a sign saying that life is nothing more than a moment and it can not be taken for granted. If so, no wish shall be granted to us. I do believe you're watching over your friends now, including me as I sit in my room and write to you. I knew you enough to call you friend, and that means life to me. Your family is constantly on our minds and hearts. Thank you for being you...




On a happier and higher note; last night, I got to witness utter greatness. Carlos Santana and his amazing band played at The Ford Amphitheater in Tampa, Florida and I had a free ticket. With great seats, I was among the thousands that were blown away by way of his guitar and simply how tight his band was. They literally did not miss a beat. I kept thinking to myself; everyone messes up at least ONCE. Nope. Not Santana. And if he did, he played it off damn good...




There were moments in the show where he began talking to the crowd, uttering words that weren't very clear. You or the audience rather, had to listen and pay attention to the topic of his words. It seemed that he was getting really deep into the political side of conversations and he began talking about Obama. I grabbed my iPhone and went to the voice recorder to get some of his speech. From what, I received, he said, "Just one thing.. Remember this. You are made with light and love, only. This is who you are. This is who I am. Everything else is incidental or an illusion. With light and love, you can have quality of tangible peace of mind. Who are you? Light and love. Who are you? Light and love. Who are you? Light and love. That's right."

He later went on to talk about what we need to heal ourselves. He stated something along the lines that light and love is the only healing for this planet. Amazing...

I do believe that love is the only healing on this earth. For it is all we need. Loving one another. Having unconditional love for our surroundings and the simple things is beyond contagious, in fact it is the positive disease. Imagine that? I'm beyond grateful to have received a free ticket from the Kelly family and to have been given the opportunity to see greatness....




Again, I would like to reach out to Kelly McConnell's family. I'm praying for you, all. In short words, Kelly McConnell, YOU are light and love. Rest in peace friend and brother...

'Til next time my brain decides to come up with craziness and questions that have run-on sentences for answers, what do you believe creates greatness and what exactly are we in the ways of healers? I believe in light and love. It is who we are. WE ARE LIGHT AND LOVE...